blueollie

Glorious February Day…

Last winter was not that bad from a weather standpoint. The time period itself had some challenges; some personal, some professional.
But this year’s winter: wow. Yeah, I know; it is bad for the planet. But the temperature isn’t bad and today saw a LOT of sunshine.

Workout: weights, 4 mile run, 4 mile walk.

Weights: the back is 100 percent better; pain is down and flexibility is up. But I am still weary.
rotator cuff, pull ups (5 sets of 10: very good)
bench press: 10 x 135, 5 x 185 (strong), 10 x 170 (tough)
incline press (really focused on keeping the hips planted) 10 x 135
military press: 7 x 50 dumbbell (standing…careful with the back), 10 x 40 standing, 10 x 160 (80 each arm) machine

Run: treadmill: 5 minute froggy starting at 5.2, then 2.5 minutes to 40; finished 4 miles in 42:14. (about 20 minutes for the second 2 miles)
Walk: 4 miles outside in the sunshine (Bradley Park).

Yeah, I enjoyed the outside part, but it just wasn’t the same nor as much fun as last week…can’t quite put the finger on it… 🙂

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February 12, 2017 Posted by | running, walking, weight training | 1 Comment

From Friendship to Marriage: how important are shared political values?

I am getting ready to go to the gym in a bit. I caught this USA Today article:

Divisions between supporters of President Trump and Hillary Clinton have taken a toll on plenty of relationships, reports Reuters, but this might be the most extreme example.

Gayle McCormick, a 73-year-old retired prison guard in Washington state who describes herself as a “Democrat leaning toward socialist,” says she decided to end her marriage of 22 years after her husband announced at a lunch with friends last year that he was planning to vote for Trump. She says it was a “deal breaker.”

“I was in shock,” she told People magazine. “It was the breaking point. The Trump issue was the catalyst.”

McCormick says it “totally undid” her that her husband could agree with Trump on anything and though it was a tough decision, she went through with the divorce even though he didn’t end up voting for the Republican.

“When things are 51% good and 49% bad, you just stay,” she says. “I was tired and older and I didn’t want to argue and neither of us was going to change.”

So, I wondered about that.

In all honesty, it has been well over 20 years since I was on the “dating” market..and really…in terms of being available to anyone, make that close to 32 years. So it HAS been a while.

I do have friends of various kinds, including friends that I’ve I’ve been the house guest of (both sexes).

Dating Era During that time, yes, I dated some Republicans and did a number of things with them. It was the Reagan era and no, it didn’t go like this:

My criterion was roughly the same as it is now for friendship: “do I enjoy spending time with the person”?

Now, 30 years later, I still have friendship outings of various kinds (hikes, runs, ball games, shared meals) but here is the deal: some of my friends are very, very politically oriented. Others either just don’t care that much, OR it is something that they just do not discuss during an outing.

So I’d say that during casual dating, I’d conjecture that it might not matter that much.

On the other hand, for something more long term (as in: “hmmm, do I want to live with this person?”) we’d have to have some shared values, but that doesn’t mean a shared vote.

For example, there are secular, socially liberal, science accepting Republicans. Really. And in some cases, I am more compatible with them than some who voted the same way that I did. In one case, a female friend was a bit surprised to find out that I accepted capitalism; we just disagreed on the degree. We also both accepted safety nets; it was the degree on which we disagreed. We both accept public investment and agreed that a work ethic is important.

Then I have two other friends who are also non-believers, but for different reasons. One was raised in a religious tradition, but no longer believes because of the great evil that she sometimes sees in the world (e. g. Holocaust). The other: was not raised in a religion, and religion is just something she ever considered or thought about.

On the other hand, I was raised in a religious tradition, and my atheism is an intellectual conclusion for me (ok, it is a type of agnosticism …but that is for another post..rest assured that I am not trying to make up my mind about any deity that I am aware of; I’ve long since rejected those as being ideas unworthy of being seriously entertained.

So, I suppose that in many cases, I’d have more in common with a secular Republican than a believing Democrat.

Upshot: I am as tribal as anyone else. But my “tribe” crosses political party lines and includes values and personality traits: how curious are they? How sanctimonious are they? Are they introspective at all…examining their own beliefs about the world and themselves? Can they admit error?

February 12, 2017 Posted by | Friends, relationships, social/political, Uncategorized | Leave a comment